being single!  how cool is that?  and scary in a way.  but all in all, im so excited.

and yet, its a huge deal to me, its as if everything in the past has been building to this moment.  to me it seems a dividing line, a line separating the past from the future.  a future with somebody.

from the time we became a couple, i set my goal to make everything as special as i have the ability to do so.  not about buying expensive things, but about constantly showing affection, always looking her in the eyes when she has something to say, providing a lap when she needs to be held, pushing her through walmart while she sits in the shopping cart and piling stuff on top of her as we shop, until her legs are covered in so much stuff then leaving her in the middle of the aisle, lol, and i go down the next aisle leaving her there.  soon enough she shouts my name, louder as time goes on, haha.  then i come back to the rescue, acting all innocent! 

i can't wait as we walk toward each other, hold hands, (prob give her a quick smack on the lips, though that's not in the plans she knows about, lol) and then turn and walk down between the rows of our guests (its gonna be outside!). everyone turning to watch us walk toward them, past them, and stand in front.  we have no one to give us away, all our parents are gone, so we are giving ourselves away, to each other.

no flowers other than each of us carrying one long stemmed rose.  roses grown in the garden that my daddy started so many years ago. 

friends will begin to arrive on thursday and the bbq and beverages will begin, lol.  then saturday our ceremony.  she is gonna be so beautiful. a sundress and a floppy hat. barefoot.  i will close my eyes and remember what she wore the first day we met.  cut off blue jeans, with that white stringy stuff all over where she cut them off.  a grungy tshirt that looked like she had worn for three days, haha.  and a cap, on backwards, like a little dork.  barefoot. lol.

but wearing the same smile, the same tiny grin, that she will wear when we turn to face each other to say our vows, our pledges to each other.  she really hasn't changed very much and i am grateful for that.  i cannot think of one time in the 8 years i have known her, that she didn't do the little grin when we made eye contact.

i know everyone, at this stage of their life, feels they have chosen the right person.  and so many times, they haven't, for it doesn't work out.  she and i both feel we have chosen the right person.  we became besties before we became a couple.  all i know, if it turns out she isn't the right one, then the right person for me does not exist.

we love road trips, and the following tuesday (we plan to hang around till tuesday to visit with some people we don't get to see much before we leave) we will take the road trip to end all road trips.  7 weeks,  for just us.  hoping for lots of top down weather.  flying down the roads and seeing so much of this huge country.  wayfarers on. and maybe a cap on backwards. like little dorks.

but for sure that wonderful, heart-melting, little grin.

have a blessed Sunday yall.